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If Your Child Won’t go to School

By Michelle Kelly, MD
As printed in Around Town Publishing, September 2006

Well, it’s back to school time and the honeymoon phase is over. Exchange of the common childhood illnesses has begun and missed school days have once again become a reality. But, sickness isn’t the only reason our nation’s children are staying home from school. According to the US Justice Department, 8% of American students miss one day of class per month for fear of being bullied at school. Bullying can take many forms but usually is seen as verbal taunting, physical aggression, or emotional isolation. Although violence is more common at the high school level, all forms of bullying are thought to occur even in elementary school. Both bullies and their victims are prone to low self-esteem, poor school performance, depression, and substance abuse. In fact, the CDC and US Education Department report that among students, homicide perpetrators were more than twice as likely as homicide victims to have been bullied by their peers.

Signs that your child is being bullied might include stomachaches, academic difficulty, sleeping trouble, bedwetting, or mood changes. A parent’s best approach is to listen to your child and assure his or her safety. The American Academy of Pediatrics recommends teaching your child to look a bully in the eye, speak firmly and walk away. You should also encourage your child to enlist the help of an adult when necessary. If you suspect your child is the bully, listening and asking probing questions is the first step. Sometimes a visit to your school counselor or pediatrician can uncover reasons why your child is engaging in such behavior. Being a positive role model and taking a firm stance against bullying can show children that they can achieve their wants without teasing, threatening or hurting others.

Consult these helpful websites: www.stopbullyingnow.hrsa.gov and www.dontlaugh.org.